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What Must Be Carried

Pre-Order my upcoming book, What Must Be Carried and receive a digital version of my first book and memoir, Running in Trauma Stilettos for FREE.

When someone you love dies and your world falls apart without your permission, it is natural to ask yourself “How am I going to bear and carry this pain for the rest of my life?”

I asked myself the same question when my 35-year-old husband, Ryan, died from an anoxic brain injury he sustained from a random bee sting on October 14, 2021. Since that time, I’ve learned that the pain and grief of losing someone precious to you will always be with you. You will carry it around until your last breath, but I also know that it doesn’t have to feel so heavy, all consuming, and suffocating. There is so much more to life even after a life altering loss and my book, “What Must Be Carried” will make you believe that you deserve a beautiful life even after the unimaginable and how to start creating a life you love around a forever pain. 

A guide to start living again for those who have lost a loved one, written by a mother and widow.

What Must Be Carried: Living a Beautiful Life Beyond Loss is an empathetic guidebook that walks readers through the grieving process, giving them the tools they need to carry the pain of their loss and start truly living again. With relatable personal narratives from Whitney Lyn Allen, mother of two boys, Jackson and Leo, certified grief educator and coach, and a widow whose life has been forever altered by the loss of her husband, as well as actionable advice for those grieving, this book is a perfect, steady companion for anyone impacted by a devastating loss.

This book explores ideas including:

●      The emotional range of processing grief, from numbness, to agony and rage, to cascading waterfalls of tears and beyond

●      Patience, experimentation, time, curiosity, and practice as difficult but essential foundations of living with and healing from grief

●      How to discover contentment, peace, love, and beauty anew, even when it often feels like life is all downhill from here

●      Grief’s hidden gifts of helping you live more authentically, ambitiously, purposefully, and fearlessly despite its heavy burden

What Must Be Carried: Living a Beautiful Life Beyond Loss is an important, helpful, and cathartic read for widows and all those who have lost someone precious to them seeking to once again shine brightly in the face of darkness.

About the Author

My name is Whitney Lyn Allen Gadecki.

I currently live in Bucks County, Pennsylvania, with my husband, Anthony, and two sons, Jackson and Leo. My world was flipped upside down when my late husband, Ryan, had a severe reaction to a bee sting and sustained a severe brain injury, resulting in his death in April of 2022. Since that time, I retired from my ten year career in law as a practicing medical malpractice defense attorney, and I followed my new calling to serve others who are also experiencing grief and trauma and share my personal grief journey with others. I am a certified grief educator and I provide grief coaching to those who are ready for their own transformation and growth after loss. I am the proud author of my first book and memoir, “Running in Trauma Stilettos,” which is an Amazon Best Seller. I am so proud that my second book, “What Must Be Carried” is out in the world to expand on my own grief experience and process and provide a practical, tangible, and implementable resource and guide for those who have lost someone they love.  My goal is to continue to share the empowering message that there is so much beauty in life even after the death of a loved one. I am so grateful and humbled you are here.

Pre-Order my upcoming book, What Must Be Carried and receive a digital version of my first book and memoir, Running in Trauma Stilettos for FREE.

Get your copy today!

Endorsements

  • WHITNEY'S WHAT MUST BE CARRIED OFFERS A POWERFUL REMINDER THAT HEALING ISN’T ABOUT RETURNING TO WHAT ONCE WAS, BUT RATHER CREATING SPACE IN OUR HEARTS FOR WHAT IS.

    Her writing beautifully encourages us to unapologetically embrace every emotion, allowing us to honor our grief while simultaneously seeking peace and joy. As a fellow young widow, I feel truly blessed by her wisdom in this guide. Whitney instills hope, reminding us that the power to heal lies within, and that What Must Be Carried won’t always feel this heavy. She is a true gift to anyone walking the path of profound loss.

    -Krystina Dinardo, widow, mother of three, and digital content creator

  • WHITNEY GIVES AN HONEST REFLECTION ON GRIEF

    that empowers readers to move forward, discovering that even in the darkest moments, joy and authenticity are within reach.

    -David Ferrugio, Creator of DEAD Talks Podcast 

  • THIS BEAUTIFUL GIFT OF A BOOK IS PERFECT FOR THOSE LOOKING TO REBUILD AFTER LIFE'S DARKEST DAYS

    Without shying away from the deep and heavy truth of what it takes to endure profound loss, Allen offers personal wisdom that helps us feel seen and inspires us to both follow and eventually become the light of hope that grievers need to survive.

    -Meghan Riordan Jarvis, MA, LICSW, author of Can Anyone Tell Me: Essential Questions About Grief and Loss

  • WHITNEY ALLEN BRINGS US A RAW, BUT SENSITIVE, GENTLE, BUT FIERCE LOOK AT THE MESSY JOURNEY OF MOVING FORWARD AFTER SIGNIFICANT LOSS, AND THE HIDDEN GIFTS THAT LIE THEREIN.

    Drawing on her own harrowing experience with losing her husband, and the path towards working with widows, Whitney Allen brings us a raw, but sensitive, gentle, but fierce look at the messy journey of moving forward after significant loss, and the hidden gifts that lie therein. This beautiful book is for anyone going through the confusing, unpredictable experience of grief after loss, and looking for tender ways to begin carrying it forward. Hint: you don't have to carry it alone.

    -Gina Moffa, LCSW, grief and trauma therapist and author of Moving On Doesn't Mean Letting Go: A Modern Guide to Navigating Loss

  • DESPITE BEING WRITTEN WHILE IN HELL, WHITNEY’S WORDS OFFER A SOFT BALM FOR ALL HUMAN HEARTS.

    She paints a realistic portrait of loss and grief- one of despair but also hope. 

    -Stacey Heale, author of Now is Not the Time for Flowers 

  • AS A FELLOW YOUNG WIDOW, WHITNEY TRULY DOES AN AMAZING JOB ARTICULATING WHAT LIFE AFTER LOSS LOOKS LIKE.

    Her ability to tackle the raw and messy parts of grief without sugar-coating it is undoubtedly valuable. By offering practical and tangible ways to navigate through dark times, she provides a sense of hope and empowerment, allowing the reader to find their own path to healing. In this book, Whitney's passion for helping others is palpable, while offering gentle guidance that supports you on your own journey.

    -Kellie Bullard-Kelley, author of Behind My Smile